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Band-Aid
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gpm wrote
at 1:41 PM, Friday May 9, 2008 EDT
Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking
buddy, Paddy.. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary. He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful. Managing not to yell, Flynn sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood. He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed. In the morning, Flynn woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt...and Mary staring at him from across the room. She said, 'You were drunk again last night weren't you?' Flynn said, 'Why you say such a mean thing?' 'Well,' Mary said, 'it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly.....it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror. |
Replies 1 - 3 of 3
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SherrifSkullface wrote
at 2:56 PM, Friday May 9, 2008 EDT lol did you make that up?
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w0lf wrote
at 3:47 AM, Saturday May 10, 2008 EDT 'Last one, Paddy, time to go home.'
'But why, Flynn? It's only 3AM, why such a hurry? We could have a couple more...' 'Well, you know my wife, i don't want trouble again... Like i could escape of it... I don't know what to do anymore. Every time i go home i take most cautious measures... I turn off lights before i enter the alley, i open manually the garage so she doesn't hear the door engine, i take off my shoes and go upstairs on tips of my toes, i don't even take the shower anymore... And, still, she's waking up and starts shouting 'you're drunk again, is this a time to come home?' 'Well, it's a completely wrong procedure. When i go home i slap every door, crash all the flower vases in my way, enter the bedroom, turn on the light and throw away shoes and all my clothes, i'm belching and coughing, then i shout 'What about a quick blow job?' And she never wakes up...' |
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Country Girl wrote
at 4:45 AM, Saturday May 10, 2008 EDT That's sounds so familiar W0lf!!!! hahahahahhaahhah You guys are too funny! And we really need more of this kinda fun around here!! :) Luv you guys (well 99.9% of ya'll)hhahahahaah
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